


Please don't say you love me

by perfectkindofmess



Category: The Good Wife (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-04-08
Packaged: 2018-03-21 15:43:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3697847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perfectkindofmess/pseuds/perfectkindofmess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alicia stepped out of the elevator and caught a sight of Finn in a conference room. She immediately smiled because she always did that when he was around.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please don't say you love me

**Author's Note:**

> this is a little bit messy so i need to sort it out a little. it has something to do with 6x18 but let's imagine Finn and Alicia have some interactions, they have some feelings for each other that have been shown.

_“Please don’t say you love me.”_

**Two weeks earlier…**

Alicia stepped out of the elevator and caught a sight of Finn in a conference room. She immediately smiled because she always did that when he was around. She wanted to come in and say ‘hi’ or maybe stay for a little while just to see his face. But he was there with Kalinda and Diane. Alicia leaned by the wall and kept on staring at them. A minute later Cary stepped in the room which made Alicia even more curious.

“Hi guys.” She said stepping in as everyone in a room looked at her a little bit too nervous. She frowned. “Is everything okay? You’re running a case together?”

“Yes.” Diane said and Alicia could believe it but Kalinda said “No.” at the same time. They laughed nervously but Alicia didn’t. She knew something was seriously wrong but they weren’t going to tell her the truth. She looked at Finn who tried not to look at her. He was concentrating on some documents. “Alicia, we’re really busy.” Diane smiled politely and Alicia nodded. One last look at Finn and she was out.

When she was sitting in her office all she could think about what kind of case they were sharing. It was good to see Finn in the firm again, though. Alicia thought she could get used to seeing him on the same floor. Actually she really wanted to work with him because they were working well together. They really were well together.

Later that day Finn came to her office with two cups of coffee. He was briefly smiling, she could see that he was exhausted and that was a really bad day. They sat on the sofa and shared a coffee.

“Do you want to talk about the case you’re having with Diane and Cary?” Alicia asked looking at him. Finn sighed and took a few sips of his coffee. He just shook his head and Alicia frowned. “Why not? Is it a secret?”

“It’s just bad.” He admitted and smiled sadly. “I don’t want to talk or even think about this anymore. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

They kept on sitting on the sofa in complete silence, just enjoying their coffees and exchanging brief looks and smiles. Eventually Finn broke the silence. “How do you feel?”

“What do you mean?”

“The e-mails. I’ve heard about the hack and the interview…” He stopped for a second not knowing if he should carry on. One simple look at Alicia allowed him to do so. “I was concerned. I hope you’re fine now.”

“Everything’s fine.” She lied with a fake smile. Why did she lie to him she didn’t know. It just felt right to tell him a lie. Finn was tired, he had to relax a little, he obviously didn’t have to listen about her problems again. But there he was. He was looking at her knowing she’s not telling the truth. Somehow he always knew. “Finn, really. I’m okay.”

He didn’t say anything. He just nodded and took some more sips of the coffee. Alicia smiled and sighed leaning further on the sofa. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the moment she shared with Finn. It was always good to have him near. Always supportive, always caring, always loving. He really was kind of perfect man and she appreciated him in every way.

Alicia realised Finn was staring at her so she opened her eyes. “What is it?” she asked empting her cup.

“You know you can trust me, right?” He was speaking slowly with a serious face. She could barely recognize him. Alicia simply nodded. “I’m on your side Alicia. Always, no matter what. If you need to talk, I’m always here.”

“I know you are.” She whispered as he took a hold of her hand. She looked down and held her breath. She remembered the last time when he grabbed her hand, she ran away. They never mentioned it and he never did that again. Until now. But this time Alicia didn’t run away which was a big deal for both of them. “And I’m really thankful for that.”

“I just want you to be happy.” He admitted still staring at her. Alicia didn’t look at him, though feeling her heart beating faster and faster.

“Just please don’t say you love me.” Alicia half joked but Finn took it seriously. He let go of her hand and stood up, laughing nervously. He said his goodbye and went out of her office leaving Alicia with regrets of saying that sentence.

 

Alicia kind of felt like Finn was avoiding her. Whenever she came to his office he was out, busy or about to go home or court or anywhere else. Whenever she called him, he dismissed her calls or sent text messages that he’s sorry but can’t speak or never answered at all. Alicia tried to speak to Kalinda, Diane or Cary about their case but they kept that as a secret which was driving her crazy. She felt like no one cared about her anymore.

She never meant to hurt Finn. He was actually the last person she wanted to hurt. After he left her office she couldn’t stop thinking about him and how to fix what she ruined. But did she really ruin anything? Was it really that bad mistake? She kept on thinking how she can get to apologize to him or how to take it back, make it disappear.

Peter stepped in to her office smiling widely. Alicia smiled, too and gave him a hug and kissed his cheek. He became closer to her after that terrible interview. They were finally able to speak like normal people. She felt really good in his company again. She was even thinking how could that be to get back together, live together, share the same bed. It seemed like ages since they slept together or had a normal conversation. Now everything seemed to be okay between them and she was really happy whenever she saw him.

“What are you doing here?” She asked as they sat on the sofa. He never visits her in her work so she got really scared that something bad could happen to Grace or Zach. Or maybe Peter just wanted to talk about Zach and her tough love on him. “Is everything okay?”

“I just wanted to visit my wife at work.” Peter said smiling which made Alicia nervous. She didn’t expect that, she didn’t even want that. She started liking Peter again but she didn’t like him that way anymore. “Maybe we can eat lunch together?”

“Peter…”

“You’re busy, I know. You’re always busy. So maybe we should order something?” Peter seemed so happy what broke Alicia even more. He frowned and looked concerned. “Alicia, what’s wrong?”

“Peter, I don’t think we should do this.” Alicia whispered not being able to look at him. She didn’t want to hurt him, especially not now when everything was so good between them. “And I don’t mean eating or sitting in my office. I mean everything.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t want this, Peter.” Alicia looked at him and smiled weakly. He kept on being serious. “I can’t do this anymore. I like you and your company but I’m afraid you got me wrong. I don’t want us to get together.”

“You don’t want to give us a chance?” Alicia shook her head looking deep into his eyes to made it even more true. “You will never truly forgive me, won’t you?”

“I can forgive you but I will never forget it.” She admitted bitterly. “And I think it’s the same with you. You will never forget what I’ve had with Will. We’re not working, Peter and I think that we’ll never work again. We can be good friends, but never nothing more.”

“Too bad.” Peter said quietly as he stood up. “Because I…”

“Please don’t say you love me.” Alicia whispered following his lead. “Because I won’t say it back.”

“Goodbye Alicia.”

 

**Present…**

“Okay, you can’t keep avoiding me!” Alicia said stepping in to Finn’s office. He looked at her surprised. He was wearing his glasses which Alicia found really adorable and cute. She smiled a little and then came closer to his desk. “I know what I’ve said was awkward and I’m sorry for that but you can’t avoid me like in high school.”

“It’s good to see you too, Alicia.” Finn said calmly showing her the sofa. She sat in its corner and Finn followed. “I’m not avoiding you, I was just really busy with that case…”

“What is wrong with that case? You keep that secret from me and that’s driving me crazy!” Alicia looked at Finn and he laughed quietly. “Tell me right now. Please!”

“It’s about Cary’s trial. Diane used fake evidence but didn’t know anything about it so we have to figure something out so she won’t end up in prison.” Finn explained and smiled at Alicia whose face fell with shock. “But it’s going to be okay, don’t worry.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well – I don’t know.” He shrugged. Alicia couldn’t stop looking at his face with those glasses. “So how are you?”

“I’m okay. Way better now.” She said as she took a hold of his hand. Finn immediately looked at her so she smiled. Alicia took off his glasses and then kissed the tip of his nose. “I just wanted to tell you…”

“Please don’t say you love me.” They both laughed as she put her legs on his, hugged his chest and started stroking it with her fingers.

“Too bad because I was about to…”

“Please – don’t.” Finn started kissing the back of her neck breathing deeply. “Because I want to say it first.”

“Okay – so do it.”

“Oh, you want me to do it now?” Finn laughed at her and held her tight. “Now I’m going to keep you in suspense.”

Alicia laughed, too. She didn’t know back then that Finn will say that a few minutes later and will keep saying that every single day. But what she knew was that she will say it back. She will always say it back and after every little “I love you.” there will be plenty of kisses.

She was just glad it wasn’t awkward at all.


End file.
